oxfordhacker

There are worrying signs that my fondness for House may not be healthy. No, I've not succumbed to the obvious danger of hypochondria, and while I have developed a form of hypochondria-by-proxy I consider this an advantage. I hate hearing colleagues complaining about their physical ailments, but now I have a snappy comeback: "A sore throat and a twinge in your big toe, you say? I recently saw an episode of House where those very symptoms presaged swift and total organ failure." That shuts the fuckers up.

In fact, the true danger presented by House became clear to me while I was watching 30 Rock. Tracy was on a new mix of brain drugs and was suffering from tinnitus and hallucinations, and it suddenly reminded me of the start of a House episode when Something Goes Wrong with someone, then they wake up in hospital. In fact, I couldn't help but think that it would be pretty cool if this actually turned out to be a House cross-over episode. And then I started thinking about how this would improve most series.

Heroes would give House a whole new slew of genetic conditions to diagnose. I'd watch Friends if it was 'The One Where Ross Gets Boneitis, And Is Treated With Richly-Deserved Contempt By House'. Hell, I'd watch Sex In The Fucking City if I knew someone was going end up at House's mercy.

And that's when I realised: thoughts like this are surely the first symptom of becoming a fan-fic writer. I had never thought of myself as being that way inclined, but the slippery slope has suddenly become all too clear. I just hope I'm being a hypochondriac here...

(No offense meant, fic-ers.)